I was messaging back and forth with my mom last night about our upcoming shower and how my two sisters that live out of state are going to be flying out here in December to help us with the twins. I was telling my mom how overwhelmed I am with the amount of help and support we are receiving and she wrote something that made me stop and think.
She said: "We all have been waiting 8 years and with each loss we also felt that loss and disappointment. This is giving us an opportunity to experience your joy and happiness now."
I always knew that my family was sad for Pace and I. I knew that they were sad to see our dreams fail over and over, but what I never took into account was the pain that THEY were feeling. The loss of a grandchild, the loss of a niece or nephew. I feel like an ass that I never saw it before, and it is through this joy that Eliza is bringing into our family that we can finally be joyous together after so many years of disappointment and pain. My entire family is embracing it and it feels amazing!
All those years of feeling alone, feeling like I had nothing in common with my family because they could all have kids so easily. All those conversations about their kids, babies, school while I sat there silent holding back tears because I had nothing to contribute...I was focused on all the things we didn't have in common instead of realizing that they were walking this journey with me. Maybe not in the same shoes, but they were definitely walking with me.
Chloe and Araya,
You girls are being little stinkers! You gave us a little scare this weekend. On Saturday your birth mom started having contractions and was in quite a bit of pain. She went to the hospital and was monitored for about 5 hours. They ended up having to give her medicine to stop the contractions and they did finally stop Sunday morning.
That was SO scary! I know the two of you are amazing little fighters, but you need to stay in there until December okay? You need to keep growing strong and healthy so you don't have to stay in the hospital when you are born. We are so excited to bring you home and start a whole new life with the two of you. Baby girls - you have no idea how much you have already changed my life.
I love you both to the moon and back, but please stay put until you are issued your eviction notice okay?
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